I recently dug this amazing dress out of my closet’s I’ll-wear-this-again-some-day section. The last time it had seen the light of day (or darkness of night…it was a cocktail dress, after all) was three years ago. That would put it into the frightening relic category of “pre-child wardrobe.” I cautiously slipped it over my head. I shimmied it down. I eagerly zipped it up. Success! I had found my Hot Mom dress for a swanky club opening the following week.
The day before the event, I modeled the dress for my daughter (she comments on my outfits. I’ve actually changed clothes because my little fashionista said I looked like Grandma–it’s nothing personal, mom). I ran through the steps—dress over head, dress on body, zipper zip…Wait a minute. Why do I look three months pregnant? Just a few days ago, I rocked this frock. Now I had a pooch. And less than 24 hours to get rid of it or succumb to the safe, go-to LBD waiting in the wings.
If a bulging belly is from too few gym trips or too many cupcakes at the last toddler birthday bash, you can’t flatten your stomach overnight. If I knew how to do that…well…I wouldn’t be sitting on this couch with last year’s MacBook. I would be lounging pool-side, tapping on next year’s Mac invention that Steve Jobs personally asked me to try, while Rachel Zoe planned my outfits for the week and a secretary fielded celeb lunch invites.
I do, however, know how to blast temporary bloat. Something on our minds (and bodies), as the calendar becomes flush with holiday parties galore.
So I jumped to action. OK, I didn’t jump. I skulked. I was sad. I didn’t feel like jumping. Here was my plan:
- Pass on the saltshaker and forgo salty foods (even sneaky ones, like canned veggie soup, cottage cheese, Chinese food). Water loves sodium. The result? Water retention. And a puffier you. To get rid of water, drink tons of it—a surefire way to also flush out excess salt.
- Although uber-healthy, certain foods like broccoli, onions and brussel sprouts create excess gas. If you want a flat belly for a big event, skip ‘em the day of.
- Nervous energy is best spent at the gym, not flapping your gums on chewing gum. Gum makes you swallow air, which gets trapped in your belly, causing a puffy stomach.
- Put down the Perrier. Step away from the soda. Fizz in the glass mean air in the belly. Reach for uncarbonated drinks, like peppermint tea (a known gas blaster).
- Snack attack? Don’t grab crunchy baby carrots, even though they’re perfect for long-term healthy eating. Raw veggies stay in the stomach longer, making you look and feel bloated. Instead lightly steam veggies.
A local spa trip for a tummy wrap is another indulgence to lose a few inches. They waste away quickly but reappear just as quickly, so don’t count on this for anything other than 24-hour slimming.
In the end, I fit into that dress. I banished the bloat and looked great for the event. At least that’s what my little fashionista told me. She asked her Pink Puppy and he agreed.